Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
She knew it was going down when I had her search for "condoms" in my iPhone Maps.
dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
He told me they were just razor bumps!
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
There is only one good excuse for how sore I am right now. And that is incredibly acrobatic sex. Unfortunately for me that is not my excuse.
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
Idk I've been drinking all day and they're having me blow shit up. Like dont let the drunk chick play with fire and explosives. Common sense 101. I will fuck something up
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
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