what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
Apparently I joined a band last night. Definitely my favorite blackout.
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar!
Need to spend sober time with him while fully clothed. I can't decide if he's a seriously amazing man or a complete fucking dickbag.
This is me not judging you for what a fine line you draw between the two.
Can you please explain to me why there are 7 bags of tacos in my bed?
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
I would say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know I forget about my personal safely when getting laid is on the line
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
Randomize
