New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
There were midgets. And vodka. If you don't appreciate the awesomeness of that sentence, read it again.
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3
Omg sara
I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
Want to go home, so casually slip my underwear in his pocket. Never seen him grin so big and say goodbye to his friends.
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
My sheer presence has sent the hipsters running in terror. I expect no problems.
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
We knew it was an interesting night when we found my thong wrapped around a chocolate chip muffin in the fridge.
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
Randomize
