Take 3 tylenol pms and try to whack off before you pass out. It's impossible.
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
Have you seen my high heels that I wore out?
You mean the one that you threw at the parked cop car or the one in the microwave?
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
Its as if he has to do the exact opposite of what I tell him. Don't come in my eye, pfshh it's in my eye. Don't come on the cat, pfshh it's on the cat.
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
apparently my buddy was fucking on our couch downstairs so i decided it was necessary to walk downstairs naked in a hockey mask.
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
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