You ever start fucking a girl and realize she kinda looks like your mom?
I am so horny I keep driving over the rumble strips... best half hour ever.
i got pulled over in my 'cops love me' tshirt. he didn't think it was funny when i pointed it out.
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
If he tries to stick his thumb up my butt again im going to rip his dick off with my vagina
I told you those kegels would come in handy one day
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
Far too many of our conversations end in us talking about sperm
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
I had a threesome with my hot neighbor and his GF and by threesome I mean I heard them getting it on in their apartment and I was in my apartment with a vibrator
and I may have moaned his name loud enough that they heard me because now he won’t make eye contact
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