? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
another moral hangover. fuck.
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
A DRUNK EMT IS BETTER THAN NO EMT!!!
Yes, but it's not new to me. It's like every time a new guy finds out I'm a squirter it's a novelty so they make me squirt and squirt and squirt until their bed is completely soaked. And then afterwards they complain that there isn't a dry bit to sleep on. No shit Sherlock.
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
My cat was watching porn with me. Weirdest bonding experience ever.
I'm bringing cupcakes to work today as an apology for my actions at the bar last night, my boss probably can't look at me the same ever again
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
The feeling I get when I hear beer bottles clinking must be what children feel when they hear sleigh bells on Christmas Eve
Woke up in your shoes. Please tell me you woke up in mine
I am naked and annoyed.
She called a 10 year old handsome and we gave her a look that was equal parts confused and “what the hell is wrong with you”
Randomize