Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
NEWS FLASH: A bottle of wine can fit into a taco bell cup.
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
I just found my "random bang list for summer of 2012" that I wrote last night.. It's written on a Plan B receipt. If this isn't irony I don't know what is.
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
Doing 9 month old dishes in my bath tub. These dishes literally had enough time to gestate a human child
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
He texted me at 4:30 in the morning saying "I'm not drunk but I think you're beautiful" and then a facebook message at 6 am saying "hi" and the subject was "oh"
I'm not going to tell you how to live your life, which includes naming your schlong
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
Just FYI: if you happen to notice a liquid of some sort on my kitchen counter with an interesting color/ texture, don't taste it
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
Randomize
