I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
i had to take my roommates dildo out of her suitcase so I could use it
the suitcase or the dildo?
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
How could you not respond to a text containing the words "goat man" ?!?
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
Is there a reason drunk me put drunk you's phone in the freezer?
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
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