You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
you kept telling everyone how your ninja turtle shell also functioned as a backpack
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
Today was my cousin's Kindergarten graduation. I happen to also think of it as a MILF convention.
Just remembered I said your cat looked delicious last night.
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
I just wanted to personally thank you for throwing clementine slivers at me across the room while we made out
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