I would go down on you faster than GM stock
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
Does being an adult mean drunkenly signing for your tax return from a foreign country? If so, I've reached adulthood.
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
The sad moment you remember you have no power for a week and can't flush.....
Wrong number bro but that sounds like a damn shame.
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
Randomize
