I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
A horse told me not to drive home last night. I think there was a cop on top of it.
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
My mom just told me the story of how she met my dad through prison. How was your saturday?
Remember when you walked in on me sleeping INSIDE a pillowcase?
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
Look, I've got a really big car. We just need to put ourselves in it and put some body parts in other body parts.
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
Randomize
