she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
Just heard the girl at the bar cuss her bf out and order a long island ice tea. Going to give it 5 min then I'm going in. See you on the other side.
Apparently, Mom was less-than-happy about us shotgunning beers before we opened presents.
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
Being able to fart in her presence and not be judged is why I pay half the rent.
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
Randomize
