is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
duuuude the clock in this car says its 85 past 19.
dear god, who put you in a cab?
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
Just thought of the perfect gift for mom.... how about not telling her about my fourth open intoxicant ticket I got last night?
You are in a fancy European city. The best way to truly experience the city is through Tinder
My hand smells like rave and peanut butter.
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
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