He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
He put his name in my phone as David Hot Guy With Tattoos and I fell in love because that's what I was going to change his name to anyways
Dude I'm at a Marijuana dispensary party. They are giving away BAGS of edibles
How do you keep ending up in these situations?
My dad is their accountant
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
In order to get rid of my bladder infections I must give up caffeine, nicotine and tight pants. It's like my pussy is an angry dictator or something
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