I just broke up with my girlfriend lets go find strippers that need rent money.
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
where are you?
Hypothermia
When we picked him up this morning the cop said that if they actually arrested every drunk American who pissed on cathedral doors, Spain wouldn't have any room for real prisoners.
The best part about this city is obvious. Someone saw me crouching by a bar pissing in my leftover Panera bread bowl and they just winked.
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
YOU JUST GOT OUT OF THE HOSPITAL AND YOU'RE ALREADY DRINKING?!
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
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