idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
The cereal milk was almost black, the bacon was still frozen and the toast was soggy. And that was BEFORE I puked in her lap.
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
I'm still not completely convinced I'm not pregnant. I just dipped beef jerky in cream cheese frosting.
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
So there I was praying he didn't go limp again, choking on a long, long gray ball hair. This is my Saturday night. This. Is. My. Life.
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
I picked up a guy that night wearing a onesie. I kicked Xmas' ass
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
I just spent 12 consecutive hours in the same outfit and none of it was pajamas. If that's not personal growth, I don't know what is.
You kidnapped her dog. I don't care that you and the dog are epic bros, that's just not cool. Return him.
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
Randomize
