It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
For some reason i am carrying prostate cancer brochures. i am nor used to drinking this early.
Just went through the drive thru and got 18 free donuts in exchange for half a joint. Dunkin Donuts at midnight might become a nightly thing for us.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
Just read the 12 signs you're a horrible roommate post and fucking in your roommate's bed wasn't on the list, so I'm a pretty awesome roommate.
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
Come over.
Look lady I can't have sex with you EVERY day. I have things to do.
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
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