The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
Can you please venmo me emergency money? i have no pants.
it's like the easy bake oven version of plastic surgery
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
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