Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
i will never coherently bang her
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
If i ever have a kid with an outie i'm giving it up for adoption
Bro I can't jerk it to my phone anymore. I feel Siri staring back, and she's real disappointed.
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
You kept trying to get the girl i brought home to hook up with you by enticing her with 12 baconnators you brought home
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
I think the highlight of my night is when I was eating a mayonnaise sandwich. drunk me was on point.
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
If I die tonight somebody's going to have to let all my tinder matches know.
Oh god. Charles just fell off the bar. Didn't spill his drink. He's come so far..
Randomize
