i just did my hair and make up to walk our dogs.. I hate being the single roommate
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
You know what id love more than anything right now? ..a back rub while eating biscuits and gravy
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
I just watched your sister pour half a bottle of cotton candy flavored snow cone syrup into a bottle of marshmallow flavored vodka, take a swig, frown, and pour a cherry coke in.
Just wait until she offers you a "powerita"
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
We're at an agreement where I don't pry and she pretends blissful ignorance
Randomize
