what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
He dated me before I started drinking. I feel like he deserves a consolation bj for all the effort he had to put in to get in my pants.
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
This is how we made chicken soup last night: Whole chicken in a pot of vodka with a box of crackers and some carrots. We should go pro.
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
Right when he gets off the plane they're going straight to a party where you're only allowed in with a bottle of whisky and they are given bullet proof vests.
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
So I was bartending last night and this guy w/ his gf said that he recognized me, so I asked him, "do you watch a lot of gay porn?"
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
Um, just removed my insulin from the fridge so that I could fit our case in there. Tell me, who has their priorities straight? THIS GIRL.
Randomize
