i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
I think he's on the stoner protein diet. I just saw him, at 3 am, spreading mayo on a slice of deli ham and sprinkling salt on top.
Thanks for having 911 ready when I jumped off the balcony
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
Next time we smoke don't let me talk. I just said something and it sounded like I was speaking in hashtag.
WHY DOES HE HAVE TO CALL WHEN I'M MASTURBATING?! This time I'm really pissed. It's like he knows he's depriving me of orgasms.
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
Whatever I'm getting wasted, my costume's bomb, and there's a good chance I'm getting laid. Not letting stupidity ruin my night!
Randomize
