he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?
The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
I really resent how she stayed home and ruined my plans to watch sci-fi and masturbate.
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
All I want is a wedding with a dress and a veil and where I can go and my cat can go.
If I could I'd magically teleport drugs and alcohol to you. Like a bad decision fairy.
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
Randomize
