No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
remember when mike pissed in his pants and then put a double cheeburger in the pocketsss of said wet pants for "safe keeping"? yea drunker then that.
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
He ripped off my pantyhose and all I could think was, "oh no those were clinic-appropriate!" That's what I get for ditching a continuing education meeting to go hook up with my scuba instructor.
It would be like if I said I had the cure for cancer and my explanation was I like turtles.
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
My arms in a cast, how am I supposed to have sex with only one hand?
more importantly I need two hands to eat pie
You know that if they offer you a bagel they are determined to sleep with you, right?
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
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