I'm slowing backing away from her. I tried breaking up with her and it felt like I was clubbing baby seals.
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
Selling Girl Scout Cookies outside bars for higher than retail value has got to be the most profitable idea. Ever.
I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
he threw my burrito on the ground and said im too drunk. fuck that guy.
Getting up is taking longer than anticipated. Alcoholic fish bowls have made getting out of bed a multitstep process.
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
...and now I welcome the sweet embrace of death.
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
Randomize
