I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
got into a fight with a bouncer over who's moustache is better again last night...
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
I want you to know that the guy who peed in your bed got fat.
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
Yeah like stabbing myself through the eye with a coffee stir and bleeding out all over the office rug
Randomize
