Midget sex pt 2 tonight
I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
If someone cant be won over with guacomole and tequila they are not worth your time.
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
Watching Fresh Prince at 9am with a beer in hand and he just said to Uncle Phil "Sometimes I worry that I'll never get my life together." I feel like that was a sign from above or something
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
The highlight of my night was when you proclaimed that the man standing next to you smelt like grape medicine...
you said, 'he held out his hand, that means we don't have to pay' about the taxi driver, and then asked the doorman what happened to your pants...
the bright side of moving is at least my Tinder options will refresh
people need to understand when I say I don't want to drink anymore that doesn't mean tempt me with another bottle of Jose Cuervo.
Randomize
