Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
I just hit myself in the face while taking off my shirt. I could never be a stripper.
Walked in the bathroom at work and my boss was taking a shit with the stall wide open and responded "oh yeah, I forgot you never have been to prison "
I think my boss gives me work off weekends because he doesn't want me showing up hungover anymore..
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
Randomize