do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
Why are there so many empty soda cans in my room?
You put them in a circle around your bed and said it was the best way to ward of the witches from hocus pocus....then you remembered you needed salt too. I'm assuming you havent gone to the bathroom yet.
I have left a significant number of teethmarks in my prhone. My mouth tastes like tequila and cheddar. Tomorrow already feels fun.
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
I just sneezed alcohol in a candle and started a fire.
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
I sign my lease Thursday, I'm about to be released back into the wild.
I'll make missing person signs.
You're a good friend.
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
Randomize
