We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
birth control should be required to get into college
We had literally Just finished having sex when he handed me a plan B and said he lied about wearing a condom.
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
OMG. Hung over at my grandparents house. Threw up on 3 T-stops, countless snowbanks, and the grandparents driveway. Was proposed to last night. Bruised from head to toe from falling down 3 flights of stairs. Debating my intelligence because it seems that "happy new years" is too hard for me to spell. How were your new years festivities?
Pretty sure I'm about to get another tattoo. It'll have mom in there somewhere for Mother's Day.
I'll just bring the big suitcase this trip so I don't have to play wine bottle tetris again.
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
I just got out of a $280 speeding ticket by acting like The Big Lebowski. Seriously Jeff Bridges is the man.
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