Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
You went to the wrong car, tried to open the locked door, and started crying because you thought we were playing a mean trick. Then the owner came...
he said i give him, and i quote, "emotional blue balls"
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
thanks for celebrating my birthday so severely 2 years ago. i just found your hospital discharge papers in my closet.
anything for my little brother.
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
My parents don't seem to understand that all I want to do over break is smoke in bed and watch Workaholics.
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
Thou shall not get drunk and hit bitch cup in pong and take shirt off while wearing a see-through lace bra again
I mean I'm sad it didn't work out but tbh he he can't unlick my booty hole or unbreak his headboard... He won't forget my name ever
You okay? Last night you climbed through my window and demanded I take shots with you and when I refused you took a piss in my front yard.
that's your fault. you refused to take shots with me.
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
ONE DAY CAN WE PLEASE HAVE SECRET SEX. PREFERABLY IN AN ANCIENT PYRAMID BUT I'M NOT OPPOSED TO A 4 STAR HOTEL
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
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