TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
I told her I'd give her some of the cream I was using so she didn't get my warts. That's when I realized I was too drunk.
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
the homeless guy was waiting for me this morning. this is the closest to a boyfriend ive had in years.
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
Taking shots of gin by myself out of TMNT glasses and chasing with bites of chocolate cake. AMERICA.
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
Dude, did you know, your blood is contaminated with over 17 non-beer fluids?
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
Randomize
