Have you finally orgasmed yet?
You stuck the head of a rubber chicken you found in her house up your ass and then started running around her living room. Naked.
I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
I don't even have to sign up for karaoke at duncans anymore. The karaoke ppl just sign me up themselves. Without my consent. I also sang stacys mom to some lady named Stacy who's mom died yesterday.
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
Sorry I missed your call. Have a great morning.
That is a horrible way of saying good morning to someone. You basically reminded me that we did not hook up yesterday. It's bad enough I got to go to work all day with blue balls.
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
I will kill you in such a brutal way if you ever de-pants me again on the dance floor it will make the stock market ticker
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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