there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
If you die in college, do you die in real life?
The guy I was getting with last night took off his purity ring mid-sex and threw it across the room.
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
i walked in the apt and she was vacuuming. i asked why and she said so we could have sex on the floor. i love clean freaks.
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
She shit all over my seat. She is not allowed in my car under any circumstances. Not even with drugs. You can't forgive a shit.
Lets get drunk and then you just wraps me into a present because that sounds like fun after the past 3 glasses of wine I drank
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
They sent him a photo of me smoking a bong whilst wearing the dinosaur head. I think that's the last we hear of his nonsmoking fitness freak ass 🤷🏼♀️
I deserve this hangover.
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
Randomize