I cant wait for the day that I tell my daughter I named her after my favorite porn star.
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
fuck you guys, stop putting fake babies in my car the cops came again.
Just bought myself a coach diaper bag. I thought it would be perfect for school. the baby bottle holders are where i'm gonna put my booze
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
Ted is on HBO in 20 minutes...not sure if this or the drunken dance party I had at the bar to a N*SYNC Christmas song 20 minutes ago is the highlight of my week so far.
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
I can't come. It's so cold my uterine walls have frozen together like a cherry popsicle.
I just realized I had arrested my one night stand from last night...
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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