We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
Talk about awkward... Just went to dinner with my mother and realized I fucked our waiter the night before. She HAD to see the looks he was giving me!
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
Have thirty minutes until my shift starts. My heart says liquor store but my future says no
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
After an hour of searching for my pants, we had three people looking. They were finally found in the oven.
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
When you start lapping your martini like a cat it's time to go home. Partys over.
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
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