Do you still have your period?
DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
she kept asking for a lobster dinner while she was crying. it was actually the most reasonable drunk chick request i've ever heard.
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
i ended up making out with my new neighbor in a stranger's car that we found unlocked on a driveway somewhere. apparently drunk self never say "no" to adventure.
My vagina is officially offended.
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
Randomize
