Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
Walk of Shame today included voting.
This is me reassuring you that I'm still alive and making sure you still are.
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
If my eyeballs could make a sound to describe how they feel they would just say uhhhhhhhhggggggghhhhhh.
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
Had a dream last night where I asked you how your Christmas was and your response was, “sex, man. Just lots and lots of sex.”
Good god. A spell so dry your friends actually commit it to their subconscious!
Randomize
