I cockslap morals
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
He said I was trying to make the bouncer dance with me AS he was throwing me out
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
Did you seriously just hashtag my sex life as #yolo2013?
No more. You can't have nice things, and vodka is a nice thing.
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
I'm eating a subway sandwich in the bathtub because I don't want to move. God bless boys from Brooklyn
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
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