how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
I just took a dump by candlelight. I feel like a pilgrim.
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
I'm not proud of how I threatened that 8 year old during drunken laser tag
It's okay though. My mom didn't believe that they were mine cuz they were magnums. Having a surprisingly large penis ftw
Lying naked in bed eating carrot cake of off my bare breasts while watching Family Guy. Tonsilitis isn't all bad!
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
A stripper choked me last night. Then I choked her. Now we're going on a date this Saturday.
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
This is going to be so stupid, but do you feel the calluses on my hands when I give you a handy?
Randomize
