What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
at the hospital. he locked himself in the kitchen, said he was making beer batter shrimp. don't know if it's the mercury poisoning, alcohol poisoning or second degree burns they're holding him for, but i've got a pretty guess.
Did someone do a keg stand in my bathtub?
My parents called me out on catching us walking home from the bar in a swimming motion because "it was too windy to walk" home...
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
Definitely just found that pen in the microwave. What the fuck.
I stuck my fake eyelashes to his balls after he passed out.
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
We just FaceTimed and I put an Oreo in my vagina for him. Now he has to fly across the globe for me.
I broke my dick don't ask me how I need help putting in a catheter so I can piss.
Randomize
