He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
The pregnant Hooters waitress told me to "make good choices".
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
I was changing in front of my window and my neighbor text me saying, "nice pubes."
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
He rubbed my back afterwards. I forgot how to talk and I legitimately thought I was a cat for a few minutes.
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
Halfway through missionary I realized I was partially laying on his sleeping dog and idk that just kinda ruined it for me sooo
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
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