why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
just accidentally masturbated with tiger balm. best. accident. ever.
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
Im holding a competition......who saw me last, and who knows how my nose got bruised? you earn points for answering either question. and for bringing me water.
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
Remember those girls from the bar? The tall and short blondes?
Is this a story I am going to hate you for?
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
I like how you were offering me $50 last night to come home with you to take care of you and your dog
i am currently wearing a bowl of frosting on my head. i do not regret any of my life choices leading to this moment
Bro, it was an EPIC night once again last night. I’m so sorry that you saw me naked.
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
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