Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
You need to come get me. I'm pretty sure that gravity's going to crush my brain
As I was puking last night I told them "it's ok I'm a paramedic"
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
The UTI came back with a vengeance.
I was looking for a pen and I stumbled upon my mom's vibrator. On a related note, yes I will be going out tonight.
The creeper at the bar just realized we have the same birthday and bought me four beers already. He walked off so I took his change and dashed, i'm bringing the case over now.
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
You offered him a “Sorry I Blew Your Brother” Blowjob. How does that make it right?
I promised him it would be better than the one I gave his brother which is really nice of me since their actually only half brothers and his brother is cuter
Randomize
