I need to talk about my life with someone. Preferably with someone who hasn't tried to jizz on me
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
Met Dan at the park for lunch and the guy parked next to us was getting a BJ the entire time. Way to make me feel like an inadequate girlfriend, random park skank. All Dan got was a double cheeseburger and a large iced tea...
First things first, I always get more drunk than the birthday girl. Like, who's idea was it to sing karaoke? I killed it.
He literally said, while inside me, "I would smack your ass but I don't want to wake my mom up". Amazing.
He told me he felt the only proper thing to do was fuck me to the top of the corporate ladder
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
My manager gave me an envelope with money in it before he had vacation, and when I asked what it was for, he said it will be his bail money.
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
I know you won't see this for awhile, but I had to tell somebody, and you're like the only person who won't judge me for having an accidental erotic encounter with General Tso's chicken.
Randomize
