I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
I almost got runover on the sidewalk by a car but wen it got closer it was a crackhead walking with the whole front of a car... bumper, lights and all... I love New York.
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
After the 3rd shot, she was running around singing, "Twinkle Twinkle Big Ol' Dick, on your happy place I'll sit" to your brother.
Put that bitch's torch out. She's been voted off.
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
Went to night shots with Kayla... she punched this guy and I got his friends number. Not sure if she's the best or worst wingman ever.
there is a spider sitting on top of my weed like he owns it or some shit
no but seriously tf do i do? i have that spider phobia but i think my lvoe of the weed overpowers it
If people had ratings on Tinder I'd give you 5 out of 5 stars.
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
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