Last-second stop at the drug store for lube and condoms. Clerk said "So uhmmm...that's a done deal, huh?"
High five!
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
He woke me up by trying to shove oreos in my mouth. im ready to go home now
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
I'm pregaming before our pregaming dinner...with peanut butter and beer. I think I need to re-evaluate my budget...
Just the budget?
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
Just ordered an appetizer sampler to distract the fat chicks so we can escape
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
Come over. I'll eat you out and we'll make bacon.
best text I've received ever.
I'm not saying I haven't been that drunk. I'm just saying I haven't been that drunk and then have cops buy me shots.
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
Randomize
