that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
dude totally just got the jungle juice out of my white top. i am really ready to be a trophy wife.
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
Mr. Clingalot just ran from our apartment. What the hell?
I started to cry afterward and mumble random things. Examples: "God, please don't make me be so gay anymore" and "my mom is going to be so proud of me for fucking a dude this time." It was that or let him stay the night and cuddle. I mean, fuck that horrible shit I'm a girl that needs her space.
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
If by "Are you drunk?" you mean "Did you just faceplant in the checkout line at Target?" the answer is yes.
TIL a potato cannon can be loaded with dildos as ammunition. Boy, do our neighbours love us!
Still not over the fact that we prayed to Jesus to help us win beer pong
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
I just had to explain to a 5 year old why I had fuzzy handcuffs hidden in a macaroni box under my bed.
I’m really regretting these suede pants.
So I got a text from him saying "jacking off...thinking of you" I think I'm going to get a restraining order
All i want from a relationship is to get drunk watch pirates of the Caribbean and have sex
Randomize
