When I woke up his cat was sleeping on my face and i had scratch marks on my neck. not happy.
only room for one pussy in that bed.
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
Needing to keep one leg on the floor during sex so you dont spin should qualify for some kind of drunk award.
Your list of "good ideas" thumbtacked to the lampshade last night consisted of nothing but "tampon-pen" with a note indicating that girls could then always have something to write with, even naked.
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
Why would you waste your Ritalin on your children?
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
What am I supposed to say? "Hey remember last spring when I did an ergonomic assessment on your office, well here's an ergo for your dick."
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
Randomize
