You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
Brunch got away from me. I might be a little high.
he's like watermelon oreos; I know they're gross and weird and I shouldn't like them, but I can't stop eating them because they're there.
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
Things that have happened since you moved: Lemmy, Bowie, Snape, Prince, civility, democracy, Carrie Fisher, all dead. Record flooding down here. Twice. This is clearly your fault.
Randomize
